In Service to the Realm

Some time ago, I came to understand that one of my unique gifts is to clean up the messes of others.

Put simply, I am willing to clean up other people's shit.

I used to see this gift as a weakness, a sign of my insecure desire to be liked.   I was uncomfortable with my desperate need to fit in and get a gold star, and I was inwardly ashamed of my willingness to volunteer and help out.

As as result, I often resented it. I'd get mad at the maker of the mess. I'd think, why should I be the one to take care of this? What is WRONG with people?  Why is it ONLY me that serves in this way?  

Such a story!

But I couldn't help it.  Whenever I found a mess, be it spilled milk, scattered dog poop, or dishes in the sink, I'd take care of it, without ever asking for any help like a good little martyr.

This explains a lot about me and my life’s course. 

In my career as a Public Defender I clean up spectacular and tragic messes, and I am very good at it.

In my leadership of bEEcHARGE!!!, our Burning Man camp, the buck stops with me, and I assume responsibility to be the last one on deck.

In my family, I work hard to stay present and loving when conflict and disconnection arises.

When a friend calls me with a problem, I am always willing to help, and I get called a lot!

As a man, I show up and take care of business, no matter how onerous or difficult, and the truth is that on some deep level, I absolutely love it.

This began to make more sense to me when I joined The ManKind Project , and I was introduced to Jungian masculine archetypes, which include the King, the Lover, the Warrior, and the Magician.  (for more on this, check out this great book.)  

Through this work, I have come to see that my penchant for cleaning things up is not just a case of mild inherited OCD, but instead an essential power and responsibility of the King, or Sovereign energy.

Healthy masculine King energy shows up in many ways: in holding space for conflict and facilitating justice; in taking responsibility for the realm and all its inhabitants; in developing and communicating vision; in giving and receiving appreciation and blessing; and yes, in cleaning up messes as a steward of the earth.

Over time, I have come to embrace and celebrate my role as a King. 

I now accept my personal and shared responsibility for the future of humanity and the Earth. I have come to accept responsibility for all our problems, and take action with others to create solutions.

I am on the job!

The rare but powerful King Bee

Last year I decided I was going to rid my neighborhood of crap: dog crap, cigarette butts, bits of paper, and my most intense focus, plastic bags and wrappers that will otherwise wash into the Bay and then the ocean.

(By the way, when I run into the guy that discards Swisher Sweets wrappers everywhere, there is going be an intense conversation.)

I make my rounds with a trash bag and a grabber, walking our dog Trixy. I’ll go to a minipark or a street corner and pick it clean.  I take great pleasure in dumping a full bag in the trash can on the way home.

Treasure from a successul royal stroll

Already, I am noticing that there is less litter.  It's well known that people are less likely to litter in a clean area, and so the effect also multiplies! 

I am making a visible difference and it feels good.

As a bonus, people often thank me, and sometimes I see them pick something up too. A number of excellent conversations and connections have started this way.  

How remarkable!  A simple act of cleaning up unleashes connection, appreciation, mindfulness, and love.  In the process, I have also come to accept myself and my gifts, and to share them without shame or discomfort.

And here's the really good part: it's not like the old days, where there could be only one sovereign.  Nope! We need lots of Kings and Queens and Czarinas and Emperors and Pashas and Khans.  

Indeed, we need every human to harness this energy within and embrace it. We need sovereign energy in this world in a BIG way!

My invitation to you is to consider stepping up and taking your seat in the sovereign energy.  Perhaps that looks like cleaning up the streets, or helping out at the community center, or looking in on your elderly neighbor.  

There are many many ways to be a steward.

The bottom line is you are needed. You will make a difference.

And you will be filled with joy and blessing in your service to the realm.